James & Emily

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Monday, 29 December 2008

It has been a good year

As I sit in our living room, heavily jet lagged, I am thinking over everything that has happened in 2008. It was a year with ups and a lot of downers actually... but in the end, I have to admit that we both think of 2008 as a good year. 
When 2008 started, we were both happy to start a new year, we were anticipating on moving into our new house, just across the street, traveling and most of all leaving 2007 behind us. 
In retrospect 2007 wasn't as bad as we thought at the time, 2008 was a lot worse! But still, it was a good year.
In 2008 we were able to create a safe haven for some of our loved ones who where in need of a place to stay for a little while, at work we both have been doing the best we can and we travelled a lot.
What makes me think that 2008 is a lot worse then 2007? Mmm, a burglary... even though we were mugged in 2007 as well, a friend whom we can not help which isn't any different from 2007, work with a lot more stress or is it something I just imagine.. 
And then I realize, I am a very optimistic and curious person; I always look forward to a new year!

I managed to tag along with Alexander to Mexico City, that's why I am jet lagged at the moment, and we had a great time! I always thought that Mexico City is so polluted one could not walk around without a mouth cap. But that wasn't the case due to the fortunate fact that Mexico is a very big Catholic country, nobody drives during Christmas and a lot of stores, bars and restaurants close during this festive period. It seems I am good at choosing times to travel whilst the whole country is celebrating a religious feast: I was in Israel during Yom Kipur, that says enough I think. So back to Mexico City with its 23 million (!) inhabitants! That city has more people than the Netherlands which is a country, a small one, but it is a country! We arrived on Christmas night and had a lovely dinner, just the two of us, the restaurant was almost empty, with not to much class and a live traditional mexican band. The singer was from Greece. And we had a wonderful night, some nights can be magical I guess, this one wasn't. It was a hilarious night.
The next day we went on a tour to the pyramids with some of Alexanders' colleagues, we climbed the whole thing and after 247 high steps we were on top of the pyramids and at that time our guide told us that it is a solid pyramid... that's correct, it is a fake pyramid! I would pay money for a picture with Alexanders face captured! 
Still, we had a very pleasant day visiting a lot of sights, the next day, boxing day or in dutch Tweede Kerstdag,  life started again in Mexico City, and I really liked the parts where we went, but we did not go to the poor areas. And there are a lot more poor areas than rich areas in Mexico City, they just aren't safe enough.
More on a personal note, we went to a big Catholic church, it almost looks like a religious theme park so big, the pope was there, I know 'cause he forgot his car there. And I saw how many people, mostly poor, where reaching out to god via praying. I admire people who are able to put their faith in someone or something you just cannot be certain about. But at the same time, I did think of something the pope has said a week earlier, about same sex couples. And I also thought of the movie Harvey Milk (an american cult movie about civil rights for ss couples in the USA). And I know one should not talk about politics, religion or money on a blog. But it was hurtful for us and many others and my wish for the pope and his advisors in Rome is that they respect others as much as they like to be respected.  

Of course we talked about the profiles we have received, but haven't made a choice yet. We're aiming to go to Mumbai in April, so we do have to make some last decisions soon. And this is why it has been a good year; we are getting closer to be complete!
Due to my jet lag,  I am of to bed now, if this post does not make any sense, I will remove it tomorrow:)

Wednesday, 17 December 2008

Almost Christmas

It has been over a week since my last post and this is due to laziness... at work I've been very busy, mostly because its the end of the year.
On the surrogate part it has been quite busy as well; a lot of talking with each other and trying to find the right people to organize things back in the UK. For the legal part everything is in order now, so now we are making an appointment in a clinic in London for the last tests! So finally we are getting somewhere again. A has been fantastic this last week, he has been busy as well with work and things, but he still found the time to organize so much on the surrogate part. 
From, I won't say his/her name, we received a copy of their contract, details are so important! And legal advice is ridiculous expensive and at the same time it is so important, we're very glad that we don't have to ask our lawyer every single question, because even if a lawyer just thinks of you the bill is getting higher and higher.
Rotunda has emailed us a bunch of documents, my library is getting bigger and bigger LOL. There are just a few minor details which we have to agree on with the clinic, and it is more up to them to agree, otherwise we will choose a different clinic. So far in any case, I feel confident about Rotunda. They have been responding to our emails very very fast, and all answers we asked are answered. We are both so very much excited! This means we could be, in the most perfect world of course, parents in 2010... it gives us enough time to get ready at least haha. 
The blogs I read from people who are much further in the process are amazing. The strength these people have to continue their journey is truly remarkable. I for one can be dramatic at times... not that my friends would agree. For everyone on this journey there is something similar and something totally different what makes one believe in this journey. 
As I said in earlier posts, we are very busy at the moment, however, it seems that I'll be spending Christmas in Mexico together with Alexander! But I won't be sure till next week, it all depends on our assignment; fingers crossed.

We wish all of you a merry Christmas and a happy New Year!

Sunday, 7 December 2008


On the 5th of December of every year, Sinterklaas comes to Holland with lots of gifts for children.
It is an old tradition, he actually arrives the 2nd week of November by boat from Spain and he has lots of helpers, which are called "zwarte Pieten". From the moment on he arrives in Holland, children may place their shoes in front of the fireplace every night and hopefully the next day there will be sweets in their shoes. The so called "zwarte Pieten" enter the house in the same way as Santa Clause does, via the chimney. In return the "zwarte Pieten" get to take some carrots up the chimney for Sinterklaas' horse. Yes, he throttles every night on his horse on the roofs of houses for three weeks. 
It all works up to the 5th of December, because on that night all the children who have been good that year will get presents! And the story goes that if a child has been naughty (or bad) that year, it will go in the 'bag of Sinterklaas back to Spain! With the 'lovely' weather we are having here it would be the best present actually :) 

I can remember so well how these nights would go when I was a child. We would behave impeccable for weeks! If my parents would only mention the word 'Sinterklaas', we would act like angels in an instant. And then after weeks and weeks, which felt like years and years in a child's' world, the day arrives where hopefully a big bag of gifts will be placed in front of the front door. Usually there would be lots of bouncing on different windows, just to let us know that Sinterklaas had arrived. So if we are ever so lucky that our biggest present is to be announced, it must sound like loud bouncing on a window!

In Holland kids usually believe in this story till the age of 7 or 8, however, a good friend of my told me that his 5 year old son is believing 'just in case'... time is changing. 
But still, it would be so nice to celebrate Sinterklaas with our own family, it has a wonderful, warm and loving feeling to sit with our own family, sing songs, see everyone unwrap their gifts and just be exhausted by all the excitement over the last couple of weeks... and up to the next event because Alexander was brought up with Santa Clause! More gifts! LOL, I can not wait.

Today I am starting on the Christmas decoration, for me it does not matter that we won't be much around, the lights have to be in place haha.
A good holiday season to all and I hope everybody gets the present you want the most!

Thursday, 4 December 2008


It seems as things are at a stand still at the moment. And that is not the case!
Especially the last couple of weeks we have been talking a lot (!) about the whole process and I can imagine Alexander wants me to shut up over this subject.
But there have been some little changes to be honest, our eggies are still very unsure (even though we had a lovely offer), Mumbai is under attack, credit crisis and it all makes one think; what to do? 
I made a list; eggies will be sort out so check, Mumbai attack is over...check? no not yet, credit crisis not over...so what? as if I or we can do really much about it, so just keep on spending! Check!

However, none of the above is a killer in our journey, we will continue. The truth is, I am really, really struggling with no smoking at the moment. Perhaps it is the time of year, my weight gain, no haven't lost the extras yet. I haven't got a clue to be honest. A couple of days ago some friends came over for dinner, we had quite a few drinks and usually sigarettes where part of these nights. Not for me now! Some of my friends did (their spouses do not 'allow' them to smoke :) and they really didn't consider my feelings. :~( I just have to be strong and I will be strong!

And then their is this other little thing; time. Time just passes by so quickly, sometimes I wonder how long the whole journey will take! I mean, we have been figuring out ways to become parents for a long time now and have decided on surrogacy. But, deciding on one thing does not mean that goals are reached in the nearby future. I have written before that I truly think tha't men, at least some men, have some sort of calling to nurture, I am one of them for sure.
For now, we are doing one step at a time, we really want to make sure we are doing everything the right way (with regards to legalities), even when it means things will take a bit longer, thats fine. 

From next week on, we won't have a lot of time to work on everything. Our project in Rotterdam will start and we will be spending a lot of time till the end of January on it. 
I will try to post on a weekly basis, and if we get news early; there'll definitely be time:)!
We think of everyone who is in the process and hope you all stay healthy and safe where ever you are.

Saturday, 29 November 2008

Keepin' my back straight

I really shouldn't have to write any more words.
Tears are shed, its painfully clear that a small group of terrorists continue to try and dictate 
the rest of the world.
We think of all the innocent in Mumbai, all the broken families through fire, bombings... the fear people must have felt. 

We have read that all surrogates are sound and safe, which is wonderful(!), still, we think of the intended parents too, being oceans apart isn't easy at these times.
As we haven't started the process yet, it doesn't get easier. 
Since Alexanders extensive traveling, it is even more personal for us. He stays in hotels all over the world and for the first time he is talking about feeling angst. He has been in Mumbai and will continue to go there, it is our way of keepin' our back straight! It is our way of supporting all these Indian people.

Saturday, 22 November 2008

my lazy saturday

Okay, weekend, finally, I have to have fun...pff.
This week is a bore. Alexander had to go to Washington DC Thursday, so here I was after all the fun things of this week, all alone. So I painted a bit, if you want to have a look at the paintings I make;
www.imperialdutch.nl , not all my paintings are on there, but to get an impression its good enough. Behold, I am not a professional painter but I get a lot of fun out of it.
Alexander told me that the tribunes (where people sit) are already been built for the inauguration of Obama, I read somewhere that they expect over 2 million spectators that day, amazing!

Yesterday I had lunch again with a friend (the one who asked what we're going to do if the eggies are a NO go) and I have decided that my vision was getting blurred. I have officially decided that the chances are too slim to get her eggies. I mean, its probably too difficult for our friend, and I have a strong feeling that we have to apologize to her for asking. It sounds a bit silly, but what we have asked is so enormous, and I truly think that she would donate if she already had her own family. She doesn't want to hurt our feelings, but there is no point in keeping up hope.. or am I too focussed on a decision? 
Who knows. 

Since all the happy things of this week, I've allowed myself to walk in pajama's all day, except when I went to the grocery store of course, I had to warn myself, ...where I didn't bought any unhealthy things! Victory haha, I will manage to get these stopped-smoking-kilos off my butt, belly, waist, thighs, legs, face, hands, feet and ears :)
In the morning I will pick up Alexander from the airport, he texted me that he bought my favorite peanut butter, so I'll take some croissants with me. I love it when he's home again.
In any case, my lazy Saturday is over, its a new day!

Thursday, 20 November 2008

Still hoping

In my previous post today I forgot to mention that our friend has mailed us about her eggies.
She is truly excited to be asked, but at the same time she feels heartbroken about what to do.
As she wants a family of her own in the future, it is kind of strange to give an egg away now. Just imagine that she will never get pregnant, how will she feel then? Knowing that a child, biological half hers, lives on the other side of the world?
We both understand how she feels. If someone were to ask for my or A's swimmers, and someone already asked us so we know, I would have to think hard, very hard. If I would already have my own family it wouldn't be a huge problem for me, actually, I would be willing to help someone for sure. But until we have our own creation of a family I wouldn't be a good help to anyone. Sounds egocentric... at the same time it makes me understand our friend so well.
She asked us a lot of questions, which we answered. Now it is the final wait. If you wonder how we feel about her part or role, we see her as half the biological parent, which is logical of course, but without the legal rights, since Alexander and I would have that right. Our plan is to be open to the child and our parents and friends already know we asked her for her eggies. So she would have a role in our childs life, we will keep her updated and we hope she will visit. At least our kid will always know how much she/he is wanted.
In any case, I got some more hope after her email.

Wednesday, 19 November 2008

just back

We have had a wonderful trip to the South West of England! But a pretty shitty return. When we got back we've found out that burglars tried to get into our house, they have damaged our back door severely which has to be replaced now. The lucky part is; they didn't get into the house, so nothing is stolen.
Furthermore, we are still awaiting legal advice, our relative is a family lawyer, and doesn't know enough about the subject.
We have decided that we're going to use a specialist on the subject rather than a local family-law orientated solicitor in a rural part of the country, where with all due respect, same sex couples seem to be a rarity...
I do not imply that we haven't been welcomed warm heartedly, the whole family was fabulous and I couldn't have felt more welcome. Nevertheless, it is easier to use a specialist.
Tomorrow we have our appointment with the clinic, we're totally prepared for it, A has a standby shift, so if they call him, I will attend the appointment alone but with all the paper works filled out already and a letter of A. Just hope that A won't be called!

The wedding was unreal, think of the decor of Four weddings and a funeral, Jane Austin and hats day at Ascot, and you'll understand how beautiful it was.
Both bride and groom were so excited, made me wonder... would we like a wedding like this? They've rented a beautiful castle and it was just a perfect day. Just can't believe how much money people spent for one day! On our way back we stopped in a very picturesque village in Gloucester were we picked up an antique rocking horse were A used to sit on when he was a toddler, since we were by car it just seemed right to pick it up. It is a beauty! Hopefully it will be used one day again.

Well, off to the gym, I truly feel like a fatty after standing on the scales!! One of the coaches said 'easy on, easy off' , I just hope so!

Monday, 10 November 2008

so interesting.

Well, it's been a while since we first told people about the journey we where about to start. From that moment on, it's been a question we would regurlarly get from people. Unfortunately we didn't have anything to tell, nothing has changed, no one is pregnant, the eggies are still unsure, the legallities are still a big issue and we also haven't decided on names for a girl or a boy; big stress of course.
But then I noticed that people weren't asking this question as much anymore, which is a good thing, but at the same time; this whole thing consumes my sparetime at the moment, this is my life! And actually I want to be asked what the latest thing is on the issue, I want to be reassured that it will happen for us too, I would love it if other people would move mountains and walk over water to change laws. Yep, that does sound very self-centered and it is. I don't think I've ever started a journey so unsure of its outcome, but with an energy which can be compared with someone who knows that he will succeed. And we will. Will we? :)

Thursdaynight I will take a ferry to the UK, in the morning I'll pick up A's mum and we'll go to our hotel. Alexander will arrive fridaynight late by plane and Saturday is the wedding of A's cousin. I've heard that A's family is very excited to meet me (no I haven't met the whole family yet). I am excited to meet them of course, but at the same time I am a bit scared; Alexander made it sound like some of them never met a 'gay' (pronouncation think of Little Britain). O well, rural south west England here I come!

Friday, 7 November 2008

Eggs and legal things...

Well, we still haven't heard a thing form our egg donor to be. Alexander and I both assume that the answer is negative for us. 
So a lot to think about.

At the same time, we've been trying to find out how to go about it legally, we're lucky Alexander is british, otherwise things could be more complicated;
The dutch government doesn't approve of surrogacy, however, we're in contact with employees of the dutch foreign office who've stated that they work 'around' the rules. I have been trying to get that in writing, also because we need that in writing before starting the procedures! But so far they haven't written anything down for us. So back to Plan A, Alexander is british, and the laws in the UK are changing, which for us would mean that we can apply for a parental order form in the UK, and thus we can go to the UK embassy in Mumbai to obtain a passport. This is the shortest version of the story ever! It will of course be a lot more complicated than this and we still have to be more sure on loads of things, but I am sure it is possible for us too.
We both have a strong wish that our child(ren) has(have) a UK passport. Especially Alexander travels a lot due to his work and we hope that in the future we can pass the passion for other cultures and traveling on to our child and it is a lot easier when Alexander travels alone with our kid and they have the same passport.
Next week we'll be in the UK and visit a solicitor (relative luckily), hope he can reassure us with facts how to go about it.

And now back to reality, the USA has a new president and most Europeans are very happy it's Barrack Obama. 
I ripped out of my pants today. Had a business lunch, whilst I was taking care of the bill, I bent to pick up my bag and then I heard: krrrgrr. It almost made me start smoking again! I think I gained 20pnds in just 2 months or so, I feel terrible!!! So, I'm off to the gym. The whole thing was pretty funny, because of course I said out loud, very loud 'oops, I ripped my pants' . The restaurant owner said ' o really, let me look', without waiting he looked and said 'I have an extra pair in the back, want to borrow it?' 
Very kind of course, but the only thing I wanted was to get the hell out of there! At least the person I had lunch with had a very good laugh and a good story for his co-workers. 
Now I really have to go to the gym!


Saturday, 1 November 2008

short post

This week I've spoken with our friend who hopefully will donate one (or more) of her eggs. 
She is definitely not coming to Europe at the moment for all different reasons, makes it harder to talk things through! It would've been great to see her again and also talk about it whilst we were physical in the same room.
Tomorrow its her birthday, or actually today, Australians are ahead of us:) 
In any case, she is still thinking things through, she also understands that we are waiting for her answer.
She said that she was going to write us a very long email with her definite answer, whatever that maybe. We were however not yet to conclude that this implicates that her answer is going to be negative for us! Brr, I'm feeling lost!

Yesterday I had lunch with a friend. He and his wife do not want to have children themselves, but do support us in our journey. He asked me what we will do if she does say no, he was the first one who, besides us, is questioning what to do if she says no.
Well, we're still unsure and so we are unable to answer a question on the subject. I favor a known donor, if there is the slightest chance we can give our child the possibility to meet her/his biological mother, we will do just that.
On the other hand, if it turns out to be impossible, are we going to change our mind? Alexander and I have talked about it of course, but my mind is still set on a known egg donor. 

You know, I just wish that things would be easier. Whenever I say something like this, Alexander calls me Mr. Plom which stands for Poor Little Old Me haha, makes me laugh.
But today I have to tell myself since he is away visiting his dad. 
We both hope we have a final yes or no sometime this week.

Monday, 27 October 2008

a friend

Alexander is in Detroit and I am in Spain. Late last night he phoned me and we were talking about our egg donor to be.
She was supposed to be in the UK by now, however, she has lost her passport (??), which is terrible for her of course. Alexander has spoken to her on the phone earlier yesterday, but the subject hadn't come up.
Alexander did not bring up the subject himself, he does not want to pressure her into making decisions, which is good. However, she did not bring up the subject either, I do understand that since they have known each other for such a long time, it can be difficult at times. For us she would be the ideal person, but we might not be the ideal persons in her eyes. The ideal person for her would of course be herself. We do understand the emotions she must be feeling about such a difficult question.
It is not an easy thought. Alexander told me to call her when I am back home so I could discuss it with her. There are things where I am slightly better in than he is.
Since we had this talk yesterday, I've been thinking about it, and whilst I was reading some of the newest blogs I follow, there was one which stood out; "I will be a wonderful mother" (author unknown). After reading I would say; "I will be a wonderful father" (author Niels :)
I have always known that I wanted to create a family, their where some hurdles to take (like not having ovaries and the likes), but I was going to create a family with my life partner some day.
For everyone who thinks that the decision to pursuit this dream is easy, I would like to say 'think again'. It does not matter if one is gay or straight, when you do not have the ability to built a family, you miss something. 
And, perhaps it sounds corny, but we will not rest untill we have our own family.
Last night I joked with our mothers that it feels like 'my eggs are ticking'. (...replace eggs with another word)

So before we start talking about plan B, I will ring our friend.
She was a friend, is a friend and she stays a friend, whatever the outcome is.

Saturday, 25 October 2008

Thinking, talking and waiting

Alexander and I have been thinking everything through again and again, well, we had to since our fertillity doctor here in Holland is only willing to do the tests if we answer his questions in a way he wants them to be answered! We really don't mind, but it makes it extra exciting cause we want to do well of course.
The staff of the clinic is wonderful and they are so much willing to help us, they even offered to run the tests on the donors eggs if she would be in Holland around the 20th of November. We haven't heard yet of our donor to be, we do know she is considering so for everyone who is wondering; keep your fingers crossed just a little longer.

At the moment I am in Spain with my mother and we're staying at Alexanders mum. I will leave tuesday, but till then we have a lot to do.
We bought a family holiday home down here, it is a new built so there is a lot to monitor. Today the three of us went to a lot of different shops and we had a good time driving around: NOT! Mother (and in-law) were both on my neck; either I was driving to slow, to fast etc. In the end I told them they could take a taxi home if they like haha.
We had lunch at a place next to a babystuff shop and I can see that my mum is really hoping so much. It will be her only chance to become a grandparent, I feel for her. She doesn't say anything because she knows so many things can go wrong and maybe it will never happen for us. We have told them that it can be a long & windy road with an unknown end to it.
But still, I can tell she can't wait to go into that shop and empty her purse! (which is wonderful for us by that time haha).
Alexanders mum is more patient about the whole thing, she will get excited when the baby is on its way. She really understands how difficult the process is. 

A couple we've met via a surrogacy forum, just mailed us the sad news that their surrogate isn't pregnant anymore. It is terrible news to receive for them. But they also mentioned that after the grieving, they will do another attempt. We wish more luck for them the next time!
All the different stories makes me SO anxious of what our story is going to be... is it one of the easy stories or is it going to take forever and ever...
Patients isn't my best quality LOL.

Anyway, we think of everyone who is in the process and hope you are successful or will be soon!

Monday, 13 October 2008

and more..

Mike (from mikeandmike), emailed me with more information on the subject.
So now I'm also in contact with India Surrogacy, a samesex couple in the UK and even with a dutch couple! 

Last week we spent the week in Tel Aviv, we were there during Yom Kippur, which is a day of atonement for Jews. We didn't quite knew what to expect, but found that everything and I mean everything stops for 25 hours. We had a wonderful time there and we had lots of quality time with just the two of us which was great! Hopefully we will be going there one day as a family.

At the moment we're getting so much wanted and needed information from different people and institutes. Last Saturday I've received a copy of "A Gay Couple's Journey Through Surrogacy". 
Their story is at times hysterical, but mostly one has to admire their perseverance. 
And also, it struck me, that a known surrogate opposed to an unknown surrogate as in India, isn't always easier. When we started to explore the possibilities, we first talked to close friends of us, just to see if someone would be willing to carry our child. We did this because we thought it would be easier; in real life it's probably harder, 'cause, it's likely you want to control the way they live, what she eats, does she rest enough and probably much more. And to be honest, I am probably to much of a control freak LOL.

Most people we've spoken to, used a local egg donor in India. 
Some time ago, we have asked a good friend of us for her 'eggies', later this month, hopefully, she will be in Holland.
It will give us the opportunity to talk about the subject more. A shared a house with her in London for some time and stayed in touch via Facebook, Skype and JaJah. For her it was a surprise that we asked her. For us it would feel really, really good to know the egg donor and we will be very honored if she will give us her eggies! We do understand the emotional burden for her so let's keep our fingers crossed. 
Tonight a good friend of ours came by, he is a 'known donor' for a lesbian couple, it means he doesn't have any parental rights but does see his daughter once a month. It is at times a complicated situation, not sure how we're going to do this, but our donor (to be hopefully) does not live right around the corner, we'll see.
A is gone now for the week, so this week will be quiet on the surrogacy subject.
Anyways, the last couple of days I seem to blablabla a lot; hormones haha 

Sunday, 12 October 2008

Niels has found another organisation that has links with an fertility clinic in Mumbai. These two organisations, that have branches in the US and UK pay give a little bit more peace of mind and can provide extra information.

http://www.indiasurrogacy.com (an organisation in the US, who work together with a clinic in Mumbai)


surrogacyindia.com (we've not sure yet if they provide surrogates for same sex couples)

Saturday, 4 October 2008

Another day, and more questions on our preparatory list, before jumping aboard the surrogacy train. We spoke to Mike A on the phone yesterday, who helped clarify some of the haze surrounding the practicalities of how to go about certain things and helped prepare us for some of the stumbling blocks we may encounter. I'll add a list of questions we had to our blog, as it may help others;

Q. Is it helpful to use a lawyer in India? Which lawyer did you use?
A. Have a contract drawn up in which all amounts payable are mentioned.

Q. What is the best way of transferring money and how long does it usually take?
A. Wiring money to India is not much of a problem although Indian banks seem to hold onto the money for quite a time before it is deposited into the account. We were advised to use a credit card due to the speed the money is transferred and the fact that you are (usually) insured against fraudulent transactions with your card.

What is the procedure surrounding the birth certificate and gaining a passport for your baby's homeward travel?

Sperm, eggs etc etc.
Q. How many eggs should we have inseminated?

Q. Whose sperm to use?

Q. Finding a donor egg. Whose?

The clinic

Which clinic did you use?

Are you happy with the conditions the surrogates live in?

Is the clinic legitimate?

How professionally do they work?

How quick were they in responding to any queries?

What is the procedure surrounding choosing the surrogate mother? What should we take into account?

Her fertility history, has she had any children, when? Her weight and height proportion.

this is a general sketch, there is far more to come...

Friday, 3 October 2008

How about surrogacy?

Today we're making one of the many first steps towards a different life.
We live in the Netherlands, my partner is brittish and I am dutch, and we want to built our own family! Our friends and family support us in our journey, and we realize that this journey can take many, many years...the 'to be granny's' hope it will go smooth and quick!

We've found a lot of information on the subject surrogacy.
At first we didn't look any further; the USA was our destination!
However, the costs of the whole process seemed to be getting higher and higher, which eventually would mean we would have to take out an extra mortgage. The whole creditcrunch does not help!
So we looked on, and through various websites we found information on gestational-surrogacy in India.
First of all we were amazed of the low costs compared to the USA and the liberal approach to surrogacy.
Since weeks we have been trying to contact other 'intended parents through gestational-surrogacy in India', strangely Google hasn't been a big helper here!

So if you know more about clinics where doctors are willing to help same-sex couples in India; do contact us!
At the moment we have a lot of contact with a clinic in Rotunda, and are thinking of traveling to Rotunda Mumbai and see with our own eyes what sort of clinic it is and see how the surrogate lives whilst she is pregnant (yes, that'll be a while:).

'Till next time,


Gay Surrogacy

Niels and I are exploring the channels where we can allow our dream of having a family can come true! We've been searching the globe, for IVF clinics that specialise in surrogacy for gay couples. If you have a story or could give us advice or can share your experiences, we'd be extremely grateful!


Niels and Alexander